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The age of generosity

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Some weeks ago, I read a wondeful book by Kathrine Aspaas. I dived into her book, and absolutely loved it. When we read the news, it`s easy to feel overwhelmed. There is so much pain, tragedy and suffering. But there is also hope. So many possibilities. She describes how our vulnerabilities are what makes us strong. If you have ever felt ashamed or like you have to hide, this book will lift your spirits. It might even free you.

I am including a ted-talk where she talks about the age of generosity. Maybe she will inspire you too?

Do you have any book recommendations for me?

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This year I’ve read over 90 books. Some in paper form, some as audiobooks. I use every opportunity I have: In my car, in between meetings and in the comfort of my bed. Some books have moved me deeply, some have taken me new places and some entertained me. Surely, some are already forgotten, and then I think: why did I waste my time on that book? Now I have a week to read a lot, and I don’t want to make the mistake of reading books that doesn’t give me anything. So my question to you is: Can you recommend a book to me? If you want to see books I’ve already read, feel free to check out my Goodreads account. 

Thanks in advance! 

My Goodreads page

The sound of originals

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Right now I am reading originals. It is an inspiring book that I already have learnt a lot from.

The #1 New York Times bestseller that examines how people can champion new ideas—and how leaders can fight groupthink, from the author of Give and Take

“Reading Originals made me feel like I was seated across from Adam Grant at a dinner party, as one of my favorite thinkers thrilled me with his insights and his wonderfully new take on the world.” —Malcolm Gladwell, author of Outliers and The Tipping Point

Originals is one of the most important and captivating books I have ever read, full of surprising and powerful ideas. It will not only change the way you see the world; it might just change the way you live your life. And it could very well inspire you to change your world.” —Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook and author of Lean In

With Give and Take, Adam Grant not only introduced a landmark new paradigm for success but also established himself as one of his generation’s most compelling and provocative thought leaders. InOriginals he again addresses the challenge of improving the world, but now from the perspective of becoming original: choosing to champion novel ideas and values that go against the grain, battle conformity, and buck outdated traditions. How can we originate new ideas, policies, and practices without risking it all?

Using surprising studies and stories spanning business, politics, sports, and entertainment, Grant explores how to recognize a good idea, speak up without getting silenced, build a coalition of allies, choose the right time to act, and manage fear and doubt; how parents and teachers can nurture originality in children; and how leaders can build cultures that welcome dissent. Learn from an entrepreneur who pitches his start-ups by highlighting the reasons not to invest, a woman at Apple who challenged Steve Jobs from three levels below, an analyst who overturned the rule of secrecy at the CIA, a billionaire financial wizard who fires employees for failing to criticize him, and a TV executive who didn’t even work in comedy but saved Seinfeld from the cutting-room floor. The payoff is a set of groundbreaking insights about rejecting conformity and improving the status quo.

Five wishes

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An encounter at a party changed Gay Hendricks forever. A stranger asked him to imagine himself on his deathbed and to consider this question:

“Was your life a complete success?” If not, then “What would be the things you’d wish had happened that would have made it a success?” Hendricks said his deepest wish was for a loving, lasting relationship with a woman. The stranger said, “turn that wish into a goal, and put it in the present tense.” On the spot, Hendricks came up with this goal, “I enjoy a happy marriage with a woman I adore and who adores me. I enjoy a lifelong blossoming of passion and creativity with her.” This goal helped him create his marriage to Kathlyn, the date he’d taken to the party, and during the past 27 years they’ve become well-known relationship experts and co-authors of 9 books together. This short, focused book shows readers how to discover their own five wishes for a fulfilled life.
Angela Loeb

Five wishes is a wonderful book. Books CAN change lives, and this one did that for me. Today I sat down to think about what my five wishes are. I am still not completely sure what they should be, but I am starting to get an idea:

  1. Doing research on EMDR
  2. I love my boyfriend and am building a life with him
  3. Continuing writing my book and publishing it
  4. Writing songs
  5. I enjoy helping others and will interview people about kind things they have done

This list must still be worked on, but I am getting there. The next step is to pinpoint how I can continue following my dreams, and what I should focus on first.

What are YOUR five wishes?

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I highly recommend this book

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My kindness project

Five wishes

One of the songs I have performed on “Smule”

Why I don`t like to cook

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I am a terrible cook. If somebody puts a knife in my hand to cut up vegetables, you can be sure that the vegetables will soon be on the floor. If you put a mixer in my hand, the content  will start decorating the kitchen walls.I am a terrible cook. I have even been on two cooking classes, but something always goes wrong. I burn what I am frying, overcook vegetables and add to much spice.

When I was at school, I was bullied when we were learning to cook. It started innocently, by a boy bringing to my attention that I had not set the table right. But it developed into commenting on everything I did: That I should not use scolding water when doing the dishes and that I cooked something for a minute to long. After a while, I dreaded those cooking lessons. I felt so stupid, and that is why I don`t like to cook today.

But two days ago, I decided to challenge myself after watching Masterchef, feeling inspired for once. So I bought in some new ingrediens for a salad and food for the grill. The weather was for once perfect so I could sit in the sun and chop to my hearts content. I tried to mix flavors that I was not sure would go well with each other, and chopped up the vegetables with just some minor accidents. No fingers were cut, instead heaps of  carrot, paprika and squash grew in front of me.  After 30 frustrating minutes of chopping, I was done and could eat the dinner I cooked for my boyfriend. Discovering that it actually tasted good, really surprised me. And my boyfriend, who cooks like a God, was satisfied too! A minor victory, but still an important one for me.

If you feel like giving up because you`re not good at something, don`t let that stop you. You might find you like it as you get better at it. Our sense of not being good at something, is too often linked with hopelessness. We often think there is no reason to try something we are not good at, because it feels frustrating to invest time and energy in something you feel you should do without any fuss. But that`s exactly why you should try. The feeling of mastery after struggling is indescribable. Nothingham describes this very well in his book “Challenging learning”. By doing the things we`re not good at, we grow. And even if cooking food won’t change the world, it will surely give me joy when I can start experimenting and actually produce tasty dishes that my friends can enjoy. And life is about these small victories. Its about reaching our potentials and learn as much as we can.

The Learning Challenge with James Nottingham from Challenging Learning on Vimeo.

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James Nottingham 

Without me

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I am not the lash in your eye, the impediment in your mouth.

Without me you have no companion but your own shadow.

Jack Weatherford, Djengis Khan

No-drama discipline

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The sound of five wishes

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I have just read “Five Wishes” a book that spoke directly to my psychologist’s heart.

Five wishes ask the question: Picture yourself on your deathbed. did you accomplish everything you wanted to accomplish? if not, what were the things that you regret not doing ?

5 Wishes is a simple way to get what you want. Each step is plainly made and easily followed. Reading it I can feel some of what he is saying flow over me, and I’m getting those occasional twinges of excitement which are all too rare as I become more cynical. Reading 5 wishes let me be innocent again, and ready to accept the changes into my life I need to make so when I’m asked the question at the beginning, I can say “Yes.”
If you’re in a rut, read this book. If you are not feeling satisfied with life, read this book. If you are not totally happy and connected with yourself, with the joy of living and with the rest of creation, you need to read this book.
Richard

kareem

An encounter at a party changed Gay Hendricks forever. A stranger asked him to imagine himself on his deathbed and to consider this question:

“Was your life a complete success?” If not, then “What would be the things you’d wish had happened that would have made it a success?” Hendricks said his deepest wish was for a loving, lasting relationship with a woman. The stranger said, “turn that wish into a goal, and put it in the present tense.” On the spot, Hendricks came up with this goal, “I enjoy a happy marriage with a woman I adore and who adores me. I enjoy a lifelong blossoming of passion and creativity with her.” This goal helped him create his marriage to Kathlyn, the date he’d taken to the party, and during the past 27 years they’ve become well-known relationship experts and co-authors of 9 books together. This short, focused book shows readers how to discover their own five wishes for a fulfilled life (as well as to read the stories of all five of Hendricks’s wishes). Neale Donald Walsch’s thoughtful foreword explores the power of this approach and explains why he insisted Hendricks share it with others.

 

The book on goodreads